(This blog is part of a 3-article intern series by Communications Intern Seth Acero)
June is Men’s Mental Health Month. This blog post discusses sensitive topics related to mental health, including feelings of isolation, depression, and suicide, particularly within the Autistic community. Reader discretion is advised, and support is available for those who may be affected by these discussions. If you or someone you know is in crisis, please seek professional help or contact Lifeline on 13 11 14.
Last summer, I worked as a writing consultant for a credit acceleration program for incoming students at my college. As an English major who had previously participated in the same program, I found the job relatively easy but incredibly rewarding.
One colleague stood out for his enthusiasm, intelligence, and dedication. This individual, who is Autistic, sometimes struggled with communication and sensory overload. At the same time, he was also an excellent colleague and incredibly intelligent. He had even been in discussions with the Indianapolis Motor Speedway about increasing neurodiversity in their staff.
One day, while the students were on a trip, we went to Walmart to pick up some snacks for our rooms. As we walked through the aisles, he suddenly asked, "Hey man, do you ever struggle with your mental health?"
His question caught me off guard - not because I didn't struggle with mental health, but because I hadn't expected him to ask.
"Yeah, of course I do. I think every guy does. Why do you ask?"
Right there in the cracker aisle, he opened up about his struggles. He shared how he often felt left out because he was Autistic, finding it hard to communicate and feeling inferior. He wished he could hold better conversations but struggled because he couldn't relate to our topics. "You guys are social beings, and I’m not," he said.
"A lot of the time, I just feel like staying in my room because I don’t know if I truly belong," he admitted.
His words broke my heart, especially when I realised he was right. Reflecting on our interactions, I saw the signs but had been too engrossed in my own world to notice his struggle. He often sat silently, staring at the TV, appearing unsure of how to join our conversations. I felt terrible for not being more attentive. Since that talk, I made sure to be more attentive to when he appeared left out, and I knew it worked through the smile on his face. Without his confession, his isolation could have worsened, potentially leading to a more severe outcome.
Mental health and autism: The statistics
As mental health gains attention worldwide, one statistic remains alarmingly high: male suicide rates. In Australia, 1 in 6 people have had thoughts about taking their own life. Even in 2024, men are 80 percent more likely to die by suicide than women in Australia—a tragic reality that affects entire communities. The Autistic male community is particularly vulnerable.
Additionally, 70 percent of the Autistic community reports mental health conditions. This should come as no surprise, as a 2019 analysis by the American National Institute of Health found that Autistic people are four times more likely to experience depression than those who are non-Autistic.
The ‘why’ for this has not been studied thoroughly at this stage. There is some evidence to suggest that some Autistic traits such as difficulty interpreting emotions as well as rumination (think about the same thing repetitively) may contribute to the risk of depression. However, some of the ‘why’ is also likely due to sociological factors such as lack of social inclusion and rejection, stigma around autism, and lack of appropriate understanding, acceptance and support.
These numbers, while illustrating the severity of mental health challenges present in today’s society, shouldn’t be seen as just “empty stats.” Each percent represents real people.
The impact of traditional masculinity
The rise in male suicide can partly be linked to bullying, which lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation. However, this doesn't fully explain why the issue is so severe among men. Traditional ideas about masculinity play a big role in making mental health problems worse for men.
Traditional masculinity says men should always be "tough" and never show weakness. Men are expected to handle challenges alone, without help. Those who can't are often seen as not being "real" men and lose their sense of power.
Sounds harsh, right? Yet many young men don't see it that way. “Masculinity gurus” often promote these ideals as the "correct definitive example of a man." Content like this reaches young men all over social media, grabbing their attention with outspoken, sometimes over-the-top messages. They listen, learn, and try to become the strong, emotionless men society expects.
But there's a problem. On the surface, this might seem ideal and easy. Unfortunately, hiding emotions to fit in means bottling up sadness and anxiety, which prevents these feelings from being addressed. This can make mental health issues worse, leading to depression and, in the worst cases, suicide.
These men are taught to fight emotions by hiding them, making negative thoughts grow stronger over time. They end up feeling hopeless and without support. This cycle makes them feel weaker and more afraid of being seen as less of a man. This can lead to despair and even thoughts of ending their lives. The loss of even one person is a tragedy, but losing many more would be devastating for society.
For an Autistic man, the effect of traditional masculinity may take a heavier toll. Since some individuals might have difficulties expressing emotion in the way “a man would,” they could be perceived as “less masculine.” This perception can be internalised, creating a feeling of being not enough and leading to an increased chance of mental health struggles. The pressure to conform to traditional masculinity increases the chance of marginalization within society, further exacerbating the statistics highlighted earlier.
Importance of vigilance and support
This issue demands urgent solutions. Since those who struggle often can't recognize their own symptoms, it's up to those around them to be vigilant and recognise the signs. Staying aware and asking a simple question like "R U OK?" can spark a conversation that might save a life.
Embracing self-acceptance
One crucial aspect of mental health self-care is self-acceptance. Humans are unique and trying to conform to someone else's image can make us lose our true selves. Embracing our individuality is essential. Acceptance involves recognising and affirming our identity, which alleviates internal pressure. Self-acceptance fosters resilience, allowing us to face life's challenges with greater confidence and build healthier relationships. This mindset reduces the stress and anxiety associated with striving for unattainable perfection.
For the Autistic community, this message could be particularly powerful. Embracing neurodiversity means recognising and valuing the unique perspectives and talents that Autistic individuals bring to society. Self-acceptance within this community can lead to greater self-advocacy and enhanced well-being. Remember, self-acceptance is a journey, not a destination, and it requires patience and self-compassion. Embracing this journey can lead to a more fulfilling and balanced life for everyone.
Conclusion
The alarming statistics surrounding male suicide and the vulnerability of the Autistic community highlight a societal issue that cannot be ignored. Traditional masculinity and its emphasis on emotional repression exacerbate these struggles, making it imperative to foster environments that encourage open conversations and self-acceptance. By acknowledging and embracing neurodiversity, we can create a more inclusive society that values the unique perspectives and talents of Autistic individuals. Self-acceptance is a crucial component of mental health, enabling individuals to live authentically and build resilience. As we move forward, let us commit to being vigilant in recognizing the signs of mental health struggles in those around us and offering the support needed to prevent further tragedies. Sometimes, a simple question like "R U OK?" and what you do after it can make all the difference.
About the Author
Seth Acero is a Marketing and Communications Intern at Aspect (Autism Spectrum Australia). Hailing from San Antonio, Texas, he is the son of a father from Mexico City and a mother from Portland, Oregon. Seth is currently pursuing a bachelor's degree in English (Literature track) and an associate's degree in Mathematics (Finance track).
As a scholar, Seth has a profound interest in literature that explores human and societal struggles, particularly those of marginalized communities in America. His favorite book is "Just Mercy" by Bryan Stevenson, a lawyer's memoir addressing the issues of mass incarceration and the death penalty in the United States.
After graduation, Seth plans to enter Non-profit Administration, where he aims to leverage his understanding of the narratives he has studied to advocate for societal justice and support those in need.
All opinions are his own.
